SUICIDE………. What You Ought To Know.

As a clinical psychologist, I deal with thoughts about suicide more often and in different ways than most. I understand the stigma and misconceptions surrounding it, and I know the damage that stems from it. I’ve been trained to ask the hard questions and am all too familiar with what causes it, who is at risk and how do we prevent it?
I do understand the pain. I know the initial shock when one hears of suicide, as one’s mind strives to process the news that seems so unfathomable, so impossible. I, too, have lost a loved one. We know that it happens, but we just didn’t see it coming. I know the deeper layer of heartbreak that comes with the realization of just how much pain the person must have been in. The weight is crushing.
One may be struggling with wanting to understand WHY this happened. We can never fully understand the person’s state of mind or the factors that led to their death. Know that it’s ok if you feel angry, but understand what happened.
In the mind of someone who dies by suicide, they are a burden to others and do not belong. You and I know that’s not true, but in their mind, riddled with the insidious lies of Depression, they did not. They believed, TRULY believed that their existence caused pain and that the world would be better off without them. From their perspective, their last act was a selfless one or one of mercy to end suffering. That’s the tragedy of suicide.

You DO have worth! Things CAN get better! It will not always feel like this. These thoughts and feelings will pass if you can hang on. You are strong. Even the strongest person needs a hand sometimes, so share your burden (and know that YOU are a person and NOT a burden).

Things WILL get so much better!
ONE may feel a mixture of judgment or disbelief when you think about suicide. “That it’s only for the mentally ill/attention seekers/weak of heart. It will never happen to me.” Or “My loved one would never do that.” Or you don’t think about suicide at all. You’ve been lucky. It hasn’t touched your world yet, but it will.
Statistics of 2019 tell us that even though someone dies by suicide every 4 minutes in the country yet, there is so much stigma, so many misconceptions, and unhelpful attitudes around suicide. Suicide does not discriminate on the basis of gender, race, or socioeconomic status. There is no stereotypical face of it and no one single path that leads to it.’
For some, it is a sudden, intense phenomenon that takes life rapidly and with little warning. For others, it is a war waged internally for years. And, like with any illness, let’s not blame the sufferers, even if their actions seemingly contributed in part to the outcome, and instead understand that they, tragically, lost their battle?
Suicide is not a selfish or cowardly act. It is not due to a lack of discipline or religion or to a weakness of character. It is caused by a number of factors, a perfect storm of biological vulnerabilities and environmental elements that result in circumstances that are beyond someone’s ability to cope. In that final moment, there is no alternative, no way out. It’s like they die of a BRAIN ATTACK.
“Suicide is just a cry for attention or a cry for help,” That brave soul is fighting for their life! LISTEN TO THAT CRY! Help if you can.
I urge you to be kind to others. You cannot tell by looking at someone if they are struggling with suicidal thoughts or who they’ve lost to suicide. Arm yourself with education and compassion. Suicide is a public health issue and affects us all.

Know that it’s ok to ask someone about suicide. And, asking about it may just save their life. By asking and listening without judgment and without anger, you’ll let them know that the door is open to talking about it, that you are a safe place for them, and that you will help them take the first steps toward preventing it.
Feeling suicidal is not a character defect and it doesn’t mean that one is crazy, or weak, or flawed. IT ONLY MEANS THAT YOU HAVE MORE PAIN THAN YOU CAN COPE WITH RIGHT NOW. But with time and support, you can overcome your problems and the pain and suicidal feelings will pass.
YOU are not alone. Some of the finest, most admired, needed, and talented people have been where you are now. Many of us have thought about taking our own lives when we’ve felt overwhelmed by sadness and devoid of all hope. But the pain of depression can be treated and hope can be renewed.

No matter what your situation, there are people who need you, places where you can make a difference, and experiences that can remind you that life is worth living. It takes real courage to face death and step back from the brink. You can use that courage to face life, to learn coping skills for overcoming depression, and for finding the strength to keep going. Remember: Your absence would create grief and anguish in the lives of friends and loved ones.
If you are unable to think of solutions other than suicide, it is not that other solutions don’t exist, but rather that you are currently unable to see them. The intense emotional pain that you’re experiencing right now can distort your thinking so it becomes harder to see possible solutions to problems or to connect with those who can offer support. Therapists, counsellors, friends, or loved ones can help you to see solutions that otherwise may not be apparent to you. Give them a chance to help.

Also Read- CHANGE CAN MAKE ONE FEARFUL, ANXIOUS & STRESSED? EXPERTS BELIEVE IT’S GOOD TO BE IN A STATE OF METAMORPHOSIS!

I can feel your pain, I want to listen, to wrap my arms around you, to tell you that you are NOT alone, that people care, that this will pass, that life CAN get better, that there IS hope, that NOTHING is unforgivable or irreversible. There are many things you can still accomplish in your life. Things WILL get better!